Today was the first day in 8 years that I typed in my old business domain name into my browser to see ‘Account suspended’. I knew it was coming but I didn’t realise what a blow it would feel like. Two For Joy Art was my baby. It was my first business. I took me to a lot of places. It introduced me to live art, to the excitement of running big workshops, working with international companies, to meeting Idris Elba (I know!) It was my safe place. My creative outlet. The time that I was free to express myself and explore far reaches of my brain.
Two For Joy was based around paper cutting, whimsy and magic. I created a whole world for it. Characters, stories, intrigue. It was a very special place. But when Fox came along, it just didn’t work. I continued to take on smaller private commissions but paper cutting with a newborn wasn’t possible. Perhaps with a chilled baby who slept it may have worked, but that wasn’t the case. And now, paper cutting with a toddler would be absolutely impossible. With pieces taking weeks to complete, I had to adapt. I started more illustration work. And in the thick of newborn, sleep deprived Motherhood, Awesome Mama was born 6 months after Fox was.
It was my outlet to help me get through the hard times. Adjusting to life as a Mum was extremely difficult for me. I still, in all honesty find parenting very hard. In some ways I took to it naturally but in other areas I felt like I was drowning.
But Awesome Mama kept me afloat. Expressing how I was feeling through illustration was liberating. And being able to find and talk to other Mums in the same boat made me feel less alone. Awesome Mama has grown with me as a Mother and I want it to be a place where other parents feel they can drop by, have a chat, a rant, a moan…& never feel guilty about it. A place for you and not just me. Awesome Mama was named so not after me, but after ALL Mums. As you’re all awesome. Even when you don’t feel it. You truly are.
And as I say goodbye to my beloved paper cutting business, I say hello to new opportunities, new experiences and exciting projects on the horizon. Just like Motherhood, I’m adapting and learning on the job. I may feel slightly sad at what I’ve left behind, but just like leaving behind those long lie ins and crazy nights out as a childless woman, I know that there are new highs just round the corner. So here’s to new beginnings and flourishing in our journeys together.